Mangalica pig
As a kid, I wasn't taught any concept that there's a difference between wanting to do something, and enjoying it. I was a largely unsupervised kid with undiagnosed ADHD and parents who expected their kids to just raise themselves on their own. So when I was capable of spending hours drawing or reading a fun book, but couldn't even remember that I had homework, ever, I was told that I simply didn't want to do well in school. And who was I to question that, I'm eight years old.
Enjoyment and passion were the only forms of motivation I knew, and if I couldn't make myself either love doing boring math homework as much as I loved my hobbies, or force myself to push through things I hated with sheer willpower alone because I want to succeed so bad, then clearly I was simply not as good as all the other kids, who could do that. And that attitude carried onto adulthood. Every time I struggled to muster genuine love and passion into something, I thought that I just don't want it badly enough. Not to enough to love it, or to suffer through it.
Being medicated for the first time was a game changer. Like holy shit, so this is your brain on dopamine. And suddenly I wanted to do things, turned my life around, took up the passion career I had never dared to try. And when the first "honeymoon phase" of the meds wore down, the same fear came back - I don't like this anymore, do I not want it bad enough? What else could I possibly want?
And I shit you not I was literally 30 years old when I understood that life isn't just either loving every minute of pursuing a passion that you love, or joylessly dragging yourself through things that you don't even want to do. I can just tell myself "just because I don't like doing this doesn't mean I don't want to be doing it." It's not a mark of failure, weakness or lack of motivation, if sometimes the career you want to be doing just feels like having a job.
ADHD and autism spectrum is funny in a way that isn't funny. Like hello, welcome to society, your brain is hardwired to function the most efficiently within certain parameters you'll almost never end up in. You're either so good at switching subjects that other people don't enjoy talking with you, or you're so good at sticking to the same subject that other people don't enjoy talking with you. Fuck you and good luck.
Muppet Pride and Prejudice this, Muppet Pride and Prejudice that. Nobody sees my vision of Muppet Wuthering Heights.
I love dark chocolate and dark roast coffee. I would probably also enjoy eating coal.
I am asexual, aromantic, and agender. I have made precisely one decision in my life, and that decision was "no".
Who'd chose to be the Chosen One?
Meet Erin Parr, a non-practicing witch. She's 39 years old with three kids and a husband, and she hasn't had a paid job in her whole life. And it doesn't look like anyone is going to pay her for her new job either: saving the world.
When she first hears about the Prophecy, no one believes in her less than herself (though there's some pretty stiff competition), but someone needs to roll up their sleeves and get the job done, and it's usually her.
The year is 1961 and Erin must go on an epic roadtrip in a rundown Morris Minor with a cranky community nurse, a professor with more bravado than sense and two university students with a lot to prove and more to hide.
Your boyfriend starts mumbling in Latin in his sleep and it scares the hell out of you but upon translation he’s introducing himself, inquiring on the price of grain, attempting to sell dormice, brainstorming silly Saturnalia gift ideas. In his sleep he somehow becomes a 1st century BC plebeian, of modest means but with a pleasant outlook on mundane life.
29 | asexual aromantic agender | she/they/its sie/dey/es I like Bob's Burgers, knitting, sewing and reading
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