Alucard In The Form Of A Large Bat🦇

My favourite kind of fics to read and to write

Rating Alucards Cuz Why Not

Hellsing Ultimate Alucard: 40/10. Beautiful animation for a beautiful man. Traumatic backstory and covers up depression with confidence. Overall gorgeous.

Gonzo Alucard: 50/10. The strangest mix of ugly and hot. Goblin rat man, overall funky little man and the reason I fell in love with this character.

Vladcard: 60/10. Could go from staking nazis to giving headpats in a matter of seconds. Would bury my face in his tits. Overall teddy bear king.

Straight Jacket Alucard: 55/10. Feral and murderous as fuck. Honestly a little concerning how attractive I find him. Overall would let him rip my head off or fuck me into oblivion.

Girlycard: 30/10. Honestly, she looks a bit young for me? But like, she’s still Alucard, so overall ????????

Riocard: 75/10. FUCK 👏 YES 👏 THAT’S SOME GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE!!!! Admittedly does look like Ozzy Osbourne if he didn’t fry his brain on drugs back in the day, but that’s not such a bad thing. Overall would suck him off on the airplane

“…you are dumber than you look…” Madara Uchiha

To fellow Canadians, Happy Family Day!

{x}

Again, there’s no worse fandom than the Naruto fandom. Minato 1 and Madara 9??? And irrelevant and boring Hinata just behind Madara at 10? Really?

Don’t tell me that Minato’s life is more interesting than Madara’s because it’s not. My man Madara lived a long and interesting life, plotting and scheming and haunting the entire story from start to finish. And his personality is compelling and fun.

Minato by comparison has lived a boring linear life, never deviating from the Konoha norm. Also, he died young. I mean, we didn’t even get a POV or flashback from Madara 😭.

Even though i knew Minato was going to win, it still annoys me that the winner was such a boring character.

Yo, kinky thought (18+)

The first time you and Alucard have sex, he gives you a wooden crucifix with a sharp lower point, instructing you to use it on him should he get too rough or start to lose control

I can see his reaction too. His eyes widen in surprise, then he'll smile in that enigmatic way of his. He knows it was a compliment, but he'll tell us that he hates the sun. Luckily we know he secretly thinks it's the most beautiful thing.

I could stare at his eyes forever

hi! i don't know if you will read this but today is my birthday and i would like to make a request for a dirty - obscene madara that has blood kink (period blood) .

i hope you are well and have a nice day ❤️ your writing is always beautiful, ily

Dirty Blood Kink Madara Scenario

Madara was also requested to be horny and needy. *rubs my hands together.* Alright! I have my instructions! Hehehe thank you for this ask and the kind words. And happy belated birthday! I hope this short scene satisfies you.

Tags/warnings: 18+ NSFW, Madara x Fem!Reader, period sex including oral and vaginal sex, blood kink, somnophilia. No violence against the SO. 

But come on, as if some blood would turn Madara off. Some people will find the bloody murder sex in this gross. You have been warned! (Mads was horny and didn't notice whatever menstrual product the SO was wearing, okay?) Words: 1540

Madara gazed down at the lush forests of Konoha from his mountaintop perch. The vast expanse of stars blinked like fireflies in the night sky, the sounds of nocturnal animals filled the warm air. His gaze fell on his home in the distance. It was good to be back.

It was a brutal mission spanning several weeks. No, he didn't enjoy the kills he inevitably had to make, but the enemies put up an excellent fight against him. What a battle the cumulation of this mission had been. Madara felt alive, the thrill of battle still thrummed wildly in his veins.

He stepped off the cliff and landed lightly on his feet whilst thinking of who was waiting for him at home. He couldn’t wait to see you. His woman. He needed to fuck.

It was protocol for shinobi to report to the Hokage tower upon returning from missions, but Madara could care less about the rules. He had to see you first if he was to remain civil with whoever he was obliged to deal with next. Besides, who was going to enforce the 'rules' on him? Everyone knew strength ruled in this world. The fool Hashirama wasn't going to pester him for going home to see you first and Tobirama could kiss his ass. If Tobirama took issue (he will), Madara was convinced the younger Senju must just be jealous that the Uchiha was going to have a better night than he. 

With the easy decision made, Madara dashed through the empty streets, the summer breeze in his hair elevating his high spirits. He was alive. His senses prickled with awareness of his surroundings. There was a cat stalking a rodent in the alleyway around the corner. A drunkard stumbled down another. Thousands of nameless shinobi and civilians alike slept blissfully in their own beds. He sensed your presence before he arrived at his destination. Taking a well-practiced route that took him directly to his bedroom, he landed silently on the roof and was through the window instantly in a flurry of smooth motions. 

Madara paused.

He was filthy, covered in the viscera of his foes. He was bloodied himself, with dirt matting his hair and his clothes torn. He was a hot mess and loved every second of it. He thought of you again －your gentle curves, the arch of your spine when you moaned and tried to take him deeper. Your voice as you found release. He longed to fuck you right now, but it felt wrong, sullying, to be in your presence and smearing the filth of others onto your body if he took you now.

His gaze landed on a lump in his massive bed. You were tangled in the sheets and fast asleep, completely unaware of the danger that lurked in the shadows. His expression softened, though his cock throbbed from thinking about your body. He thought of you again, of your bright eyes and smile whenever you saw him return home as you ran to greet him at the door. He almost growled out loud, but managed to contain himself. He made quick work of tossing his ruined garments and cleansing himself for you before he joined you in bed.

---------------

Madara nearly laughed as he explored your pliant body. Were you really a kunoichi? You were such a deep sleeper you haven’t even stirred despite how he handled you. He copped a feel of your squishy tits and wrapped his arms around your limp form to snuggle you. He sighed. How he missed this these past weeks.

His cock twitched again when he caught the scent of your hair. It was something lightly floral. He needed more of your body.

Upon feeling your ring around his probing fingers, he hissed. Only a few weeks apart and you were already this tight. He couldn’t wait to get inside you. Madara kept scissoring his fingers into your soft hole, pressing his nose to your neckline and inhaling hungrily. He missed everything about you greatly.

He wanted to be gentle…but now was not the time. Your runny slick provided ample lubrication and though he was large, you would be able to take him. He pulled his digits from your opening, only to be hit by the pungent smell of iron.

What’s this?

Excitement clouded his mind as he realized you were menstruating. The rabid Uchiha lapped up the fluids coating his digits before rational thought could stop him. The taste of blood filled his mouth, almost like he was still in battle. He groaned, fisting his steel cock as he debated whether to plunder his conquest now or to eat it first. Your essence was absolutely delicious.

He needed more of you. He got between your legs and gently eased them apart, then started feasting. Soon, the exquisite mixture of your arousal and blood flowed as he got you wetter and wetter. What could make one feel more alive than this, being surrounded by his woman’s pussy slick and her essence of life? 

He buried his tongue to the hilt up your sheath. He relished the metallic tang and silken slime melting on his tongue as he kept drinking. Your fluids slid down his jaw and crept between the crack of your bum, soaking into the snow white silk of the sheets. A problem for tomorrow.

“Mada?” You jerked awake in alarm before feeling the familiar signature of your love’s powerful chakra. You could barely make out his shape in the darkness, but you knew it was him. You felt his excitement buzzing in the air.

"Shhh." He reassured you that everything was okay and flicked that sinful tongue on your clit before diving back into you to taste and smell your blood surrounding him.

The fog was slow to clear from your mind (some ninja you were). He wasn't expected to be home tonight, the mission ended early? Then again, it was very like Madara to make sure his enemies were thoroughly vanquished so he could rush home to you sooner.

You remembered it was the heaviest day of your period and clenched your thighs around Madara’s spiky head. The naughty, taboo act was embarrassing, but even you couldn't deny his skill. He eased the cramping and discomfort of your monthly. 

Your lover kissed his way up your abdomen to capture your lips and share his delight. "Missed you," he whispered.

You didn't enjoy the taste of blood like he did, but you dreamed of being back in his arms for weeks. You returned his delicate kiss, matching it when it turned feverish. A hard length prodded your rear and you shifted to line up with it.

He buried himself in a single lunge. Your frame tensed, but the shock of the stretch passed quickly and pure euphoria set in. Bracing yourself up on your elbows, you urgently threw your hips back onto his in a sloppy meeting. The two of you moved as one. He gently palmed your face and stroked your cheek, despite the need in his own expression. Faster and faster he threw himself into you and you responded by grinding hard on him with a shudder.

Madara growled and pulled you to your knees with animalistic hunger, the bottom half of his face stained with a runny crimson, stabilizing himself on the headboard with one fist as he kept up his brutalizing pace. He was more beast than man right now. You squealed when he dragged across your sweet spot, making your fluids squelch with every thrust.

Your fingers caressed along his plundering shaft and made their way up your drooling slit to find your nub. You stroked yourself while he pounded you from behind for what felt like an eternity. He finally tensed, grabbing your hips to bury himself fully before shuddering. Your inner thighs that were already soaked in fluid were soiled by the rivulets of hot cum leaking from your tired, overstuffed snatch. The cooling liquids on the sheets were cold against your overheated skin.

His eyes were closed when he filled your core. A low, vibrating moan made its way from his throat, which could be felt against your back. Madara’s hands were everywhere -he petted between your legs and stroked down those limbs and back up to your hips. He licked your earlobes and brought his hands up to wrap around your waist to give you a hard squeeze before fondling your chest and wrapping a paw around your throat. He kissed you passionately, your tongues sparring once more as the sun rose to welcome a new day.

Daylight penetrated through the edges of the curtains to illuminate the room. The aftermath of the night looked like a crime scene. Your naked bodies and faces were covered in palm-width streaks of blood. Hand prints adorned the headboard, the fingerprints clearly discernible between each stain. Thank goodness the headboard was dark leather. It should be washable. The space you were lying on was drenched with dried, dark red pools across the entire bed at crotch level.

You giggled. You love Madara, but he only thinks with his dick once the hormones start running. What were you going to do with your ruined bed sheets and mattress?

More genderfluid Alucard

From his wiki page:

"In regards to Alucard's many forms, Hirano had stated that he no longer cares about him being a woman or a man; to which, Alucard eventually said a line relating to this in Volume 9 of Hellsing. Continuing, Hirano said that Alucard took so many lives; and therefore, those lives eventually altered Alucard's personal identity. The "Control Art Restriction System" comes into play to help suppress this. His initial personality is male, so he took that as his basic form."

If Alucard possesses the knowledge of each of his millions of souls, does he also know every language they knew? So is he like Neo where if he wants a new skill like a language, he can just download drink a person who he knows has it?

Serious question from a Hellsing noob.