Poly!marauders - Blog Posts

I, yet again, need help finding a fic.

It’s a marauders fic and I read it a while ago.

It’s poly!marauders x reader where r gets so overstimulated she uses her safe word and vomits because of the overstimulation.

the art of letting go; jp x sb x rl

pairing: james potter x sirius black x remus lupin

synopse:  James always wants to take care and love the others so much, that he sometimes forgets to do so with himself. thankfully, he has two amazing boyfriends to do so.

warnings: slight angst, panic attacks, self hate kinda, poly relationship, maybe peter redemption, hurt/comfort, i’m actually proud of this, too many italics

word count: 3.7k

a/n: long time no see :) literally love the idea of these three together. i’ve only read things where james is the one putting sirius and remus back together, so why not change that? also, if you don’t like, don’t read.

James always felt a necessity to care. To give. To love.

Keep reading

hi!! i saw that you had your request open and i was thinking maybe poly! marauders + lily taking out (or asking) reader on a first date? i think it would be cute.

i read your last fic on them and i loved how you wrote for them! also i just want to say i love your writing!!

poor shy reader - thoughts and prayers fr

marauders + lily x shy!reader who go on a date

CW: continuation from this fic, fem!reader is in Hufflepuff, some nerves/anxiety, fluff

You’ve made a mistake.

You’ve made a mistake and think it might be too late to do anything.

“Are you almost ready? The Gryffindor’s bullied a first year into letting them into the common room and now they’re downstairs waiting for you.” One of your roommates advised you in a bored tone as she moved to sit on her bed.

You’ve made a mistake.

“Can you tell them I’m poorly or something?” You begged; tone inlaid with a shrill quality you tried to clear away. “I can’t do this.”

She looked at you like you had grown three heads. “What? You can’t go on a date with four of the hottest people in our year? Get a grip.”

“Please.” You tried again.

“I’m not a bloody owl, L/N.” She spat as she opened up a magazine, effectively shutting you out.

You stared at yourself in the mirror again; the fourth outfit you tried on for your date with the four Gryffindor’s you’d stupidly agreed to while still sat in Remus’ lap at the Gryffindor party where you’d actually sodding kissed Lily Evans.

You’ve made a mistake.

“Hey gorgeous.” You heard at your dorm room door, causing your room mate to groan dramatically as she fell backwards on her bed. 

Lily’s auburn eyebrows furrowed at her before her eyes flit back to you; any tension immediately melting into a look far too soft to be for you. “Are you ready to go?”

No.

You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time; you were about to be escorted to Hogsmeade by the most beautiful people to grace the halls of Hogwarts arguably ever and you couldn’t help but feel entirely too plain. 

Lily breathed out a chuckled through her nose and moved to stand behind you, looking at your reflection in the mirror as she moved a lock of your hair behind your shoulder. “As much as I too would love to sit here and admire your reflection, I’m afraid it’s not wise to leave the boys alone unattended for too long.” She murmured as she pressed a kiss to your cheek.

They were going to be the death of you.

As if punctuating the end of Lily’s sentence and your thoughts, you heard a faint popping sound from the common room and the sound of chuckling.

“We ought to go.” Lily said, casually (for her…not for you) taking your hand and all but dragging you out of your room.

When you got downstairs, it was to the sight of first year Hufflepuffs glaring as menacingly as first year Hufflepuffs could as they all marched past the Marauders.

“What did you boys do now?” Lily chided playfully as they all turned to see you.

Their mischievous smiles quickly turned soft and sweet as they took you in. 

“Oh my gods!” James exclaimed as he stepped towards the two of you. “My sweet Lily flower, where did you find this angel?”

Your gaze dropped immediately to your feet as Lily - the traitor - moved away from your side to stand near Remus. 

“I’d ask if it hurt when you fell from heaven but, I don’t see a single imperfection, Gorgeous.” Sirius continued.

You huffed and crossed your arms as you looked across the room to see the first years still glaring at the group of you as they shed their - quite ashey - robes.

“Erm, why are the first years shaking ash off their robes?” You asked cautiously. 

As if they had only just remembered that they’d been causing mischief a mere few moments ago, James and Sirius stepped into action. 

“Oh right!” James said with an awkward laugh. “We, uhm, we should get going.” 

And before you could ask any follow up questions (or ask to reschedule, perhaps), you had Sirius on one of your arms and James on the other and were being ushered from the Hufflepuff common room.

Helga help me. 

The other four did most of the talking on your walk to Hogsmeade, which you were eternally grateful for. But you were now standing in line at Zonko’s - to which the boys insisted they go and Lily had left it up to you and…well…have you seen those boys? How were you expected to say no? - and you felt like every other student’s eyes were on you.

What is she doing with them? You could imagine them snickering to each other. 

Think this is one of their pranks? Their friends would respond. 

Evans usually isn’t the type but… it could be funny to watch anyhow.

Your body was itchy and your skin felt hot; you needed to get out of the store.

“Hey.” James murmured quietly, resting his chin on your shoulder as his body created a barrier between you and the other patrons of the store; strong arms wrapping protectively around your front as the other three pretended not to notice. “I think we lost you there for a second; you okay?”

You nodded, not quite trusting your voice not to betray your anxiety. 

“Do you regret agreeing to come out with us?” He asked quietly; no ire or contempt detected in his voice. He truly was just trying to check in and make sure you were okay.

“No.” You responded firmly, quickly. Clearing your throat and responding again. “No, I don’t.”

You could feel James smile as he pressed a chaste kiss to your cheek. “We’re almost done here and then we can go wherever you want.” He promised; and though that had been the end of the conversation, he stayed glued (what certainly felt like possessively) to your side until you had all exited the joke shop and stood on the cobble stoned roads of Hogsmeade. 

“So where do you wanna go, Princess?” Sirius asked as everyone paused to face you in a semi-circle.

For the ground to swallow me up, maybe? 

“Erm, I…I’m not sure, I didn’t…really think about it.” You admitted awkwardly, wrapping your arms around your middle as if trying to shield yourself from your dates’ gazes. 

Sirius looked like he was going to make a teasing remark when Lily elbowed him. 

“Do you like sweets? Why don’t we head to Honeydukes; Moony needs to restock his chocolate stash anyway.” James offered jovially, turning towards the direction of the sweets shop without waiting to see if anyone was following him.

Sirius winked at a blushing Remus as he and Lily followed James and Sirius offered you his hand.

“Come on; I’ll buy you a pack of those sugar quills you like.” He said as he swung your hands between the two of you playfully, slowly following your little group towards the shop.

“How d’you know I like sugar quills?” You asked quietly, earning you a snort from the black-haired boy. 

“Do you know Lily’s favourite lolly flavour?”

You felt your cheeks heat but nodded. “Cherry.”

He made a quiet proud sound as he carried on. “And James? What does he like from Honeydukes?”

“Jelly Slugs - particularly the watermelon flavour.”

Sirius hummed in acknowledgement and bumped into you before continuing to swing your arms together. “And mine?” He asked; and if you weren’t mistaken, there was a hint of vulnerability in the notoriously cocky boy's voice. 

You smiled up at him at that. “The Peppermint Toads.”

That caused him to beam at you, looking down at your lips before his brows furrowed slightly and he dropped his gaze shyly to his boots.

“And how do you know our favourite sweets?”

You grumbled and went to pull your hand away from him, but he held fast. “Because I’m a creepy tosser.”

He let out an offended scoff at that and pulled you over to him, tickling at your sides in punishment. “You are not a creepy tosser, you little minx!” 

He relented his attack on your sides as you fought to catch your breath; staring up into his silver gaze in anticipation - for what? You weren’t sure. 

“Is it because, perhaps, you fancy us?” He offered. 

You lowered your head to his chest; embarrassed at being known, perceived, caught in your obvious affections for them - notwithstanding the fact that you’d actually accepted an invitation for a date with them which should have tipped them off anyways. 

“So,” Sirius continued, resting his chin on top of your head and pulling you in tighter to his chest. “Shouldn’t we know the same of you if we were to fancy you?”

You sucked in a deep breath - definitely not savouring the smell of sandalwood and mint emanating from Sirius’ chest - and pulled away.

“It would have been quite brash of me to assume so many Gryffindor’s could possibly fancy me.” You admitted quietly as you carried on towards the shop where James was waiting rather impatiently as Lily tried to convince him to stand still. 

“Then be brash, darling.” Sirius drawled. “‘Cause it’s true.”

“Don’t kill the poor thing before we’ve a chance to spoil her, Pads.” James called as Lily and Remus smiled at you.

“I’m not, I’m not.” Sirius grumbled as he swatted James’ arse and all but forced him into the store.

“Can’t believe you didn’t kiss her.” Lily hissed as they walked ahead of you and Remus.

“I was nervous!” You heard Sirius whisper back.

“Nervous!?” James and Lily bawked; you and Remus sharing a shy, awkward smile as you pretended you couldn’t hear them.

“Come with me.” Remus finally offered, motioning towards the wall of Chocolate Frogs with his head as he took your hand. “We’ll find them later.”

You and Remus walked through the aisles as he told you stories of Sirius, James, and Peter trying each and every one of the sweets (even the silly ones). Apparently, they learned Peter was allergic to earthworms due to an unfortunate selection of Berties Botts Every-Flavour Beans.

“How was that the thing that tipped him off? Did he never try picking one up as a kid?” You asked through a laugh.

“Right? What kid doesn’t spend time making mud pies and catching earthworms? We figured just for that, the sod almost deserved to go anaphylactic.” Remus joked with no real malice. 

You approached a stand of sample chocolates that caught Remus’ eye.

“Hm, nutmeg Cauldron Cakes; that looks good.” You commented as you considered the pastries.

Remus’ mouth tipped up in a mischievous smile as he quickly picked up one of the small samples and held it in front of you.

“Open.” 

You stared at him dumbly. “I…I’m sorry?”

His smirk only grew as he kept his eyes on your lips. “Open.” He instructed again.

Not willing to stand here with a pastry held in front of your face asking stupid questions any longer, you acquiesced and allowed Remus to feed you the pastry. 

He moved, likely slower than necessary, and just as you went to close your mouth, he paused his movements and slowly slid his thumb between your lips, pulling your bottom lip down as he went.

You didn’t realise you’d been standing there in shock until he raised an expectant eyebrow at you, prompting you to chew the treat now sitting idly on your tongue. 

“Good girl.” 

Merlin’s fucking tits, he was going to make you choke.

Apparently you weren't the only one, if the sound of James’ strangled groan echoing from where he, Sirius, and Lily had been standing and staring at the two of you.

James looked like he couldn’t tell which of you he was most jealous of, Sirius stood staring with his eyebrows up near his hair line and his mouth wide open, and Lily watched with a knowing smirk adorning her face. 

“Was it good?” James whispered over to you.

You nodded dumbly, looking up at Remus as if you were somehow asking for his agreement.

“Better let me confirm.” He murmured as he leaned down; one hand cradling the back of your head and the other tilting your chin up to meet his lips, though he stopped just before they connected. 

You could feel the gentle puffs of Remus' breath hitting your lips from where your eyes were glued to his mouth. When it became obvious you were at a stalemate, your eyes flitted up to meet him.

His eyes were on yours as they danced with a mixture of mischief and questions.

Questions.

...“Is it okay if she kisses you, pretty girl?”...

And you weren’t a Gryffindor; you weren’t brave or bold, nor were you daring. But dammit, you were a Hufflepuff; you had a propensity for hard work, and you could do hard things!

So, you let your eyes fall back to Remus’ lips before you closed the distance between you two.

You felt him smile into the kiss before he deepened it, finally pulling away with a pleased hum though he kept his hands on either side of your face. 

“She wasn’t lying, Prongs; it was good.” He called over, gaze never leaving your face.

You heard what you could only imagine was Sirius’ boot stomping petulantly from his place as Lily barked a laugh at him. “I was this close to being the second one to kiss her!”

You dropped your head into Remus’ chest only for him to chuckle as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Better luck next time, Pads.” He taunted.

You officially knew your suspicions were correct: the Gryffindor’s really were trying to kill you.

James and Sirius and Remus and Lily and *takes a dramatic breath* you?

this one's for you @enamoredwithbella, thanks for sorting this idea out with me @unstablereader

poly!Marauders + Lily x shy!reader who is so smitten with them

CW: fem!reader, reader has hair long enough to be played with, reader is in Hufflepuff, swearing, consent because it's sexy AF

This was obviously a bad idea.

You’re not even sure how your friends managed to convince you to attend the Gryffindor party, but you swore to every deity it would never happen again.

There were too many people (most of whom you’d never spoken to before), it was too loud (songs you didn’t particularly care for), and the fifteenth time someone bumped into you nearly sent you over the edge.

“Whoa there, sweetheart.” A low voice commented as an arm quickly righted you from your nearly horizontal position. “Y’alright?”

You looked up to see the face of none other than Gryffindor quidditch captain James Potter beaming down at you.

You were ashamed of yourself for the way that smile made you feel.

“Erm, yup! Thanks.” You squeaked, quickly freeing yourself from James’ grasp so fast that you nearly knocked someone else over in your attempt at creating distance between you and the Headboy.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like James. On the contrary; you were rather smitten with him.

Him and his partners - which was nothing short of dense in simple terms.

But you couldn’t help the way you blushed when he held the doors open for you as you walked into classes, or the friendly smile and wave he’d shoot at you when he saw you on Prefect rounds. 

You sort of wished he’d stop being so bloody nice to you; maybe then you’d be able to get over this crush that was never going to amount to anything.

But James was taken; three times over. 

And what a sodding group they were.

Heart Throb of Hogwarts™ Sirius Black in his effortless style, his devil may care attitude, and his insatiable flirting. Being noticed by Sirius felt like your favourite rockstar singing a song written just for you. 

And don’t even get you started on the enigma that is Remus Lupin; the Cassanova of Gryffindor tower. Everyone in your year (and likely the years below you) had at some point or another crushed hard on the quiet Marauder; but it really couldn’t be helped. He was tall, he was handsome, he was kind, and though he was far more quiet than his counterparts, the quips he shared with you never ceased to reduce you to a fit of laughter.

And gods, was Lily Evans ever beautiful. She was the total package; she was funny, outgoing, smart, and stunning. Looking at her even now with her long auburn hair as she threw her head back in laughter; so open and care free in her actions. You weren’t sure if you wanted to be her or being underneath-

No.

No. That was not a nice thing to think about someone who was in a committed relationship.

You let out a sigh as you zoned back into the fact that James still had one of his hands on your elbow and was smiling curiously at you. 

“Thanks for the save! I really owe you one.” You chuckled awkwardly and nearly took out one of the Prewett twins in your haste to leave Potter’s vicinity. 

Unfortunately, trouble seemed to be following you.

And by trouble, you meant Sirius Black.

“Damn, Hufflepuff!” He cheered as he moved a sultry gaze up and down your body appreciatively. “Give us a spin, dollface.”

You felt all the blood in your body migrate to your cheeks as you fought to keep your mouth from falling open.

Lily, the beautiful angel (or the evil temptress, depending on how you looked at it), swatted at Sirius from her perch on the arm of the chair her boyfriend was currently occupying.

“Down boy; you’re going to scare her away.” She teased with a smirk as she winked at you. 

You felt momentarily grateful for her.

And then she spoke again.

“Then none of us will get to look at her.”

Fucking Helga, was it hot in here? They needed to open more windows; preferably one you could launch yourself out of right now, thank you very much. 

“That’d be such a shame, really. Sorry doll, you don’t gotta spin - no one else here deserves to appreciate such a view.”

“Okay.” You squeaked and turned in search of your friends.

You know what? Fuck your friends; you were leaving with or without them. 

They weren’t….flirting with you, were they?

Surely not.

Of course not.

What a ridiculous thing to think.

But…it certainly felt like they were flirting with you.

Maybe one more glance?

Just as you were about to approach the portrait hole, you turned for one more look at the objects of your affection and your current tormentors and - yup, sure enough - Sirius, Lily, and now James were all standing there smiling at you.

They were watching you leave?!

Okay time to go, that is enough nonsense for one day. 

You spun and collided with something tall and solid which thankfully caught your arms as you all but ricocheted off of them.

“Hey there, dove. Where’re you headed in such a hurry?”

Please for the love of gods, don’t tell me…

But of course, you looked up to see the face of one Remus Fucking Lupin smirking down at you. 

“You lot are everywhere.” You whispered in awe. The bastard only chuckled in response.

“Come on you guys! We’re going to start a game of truth or dare!” Lily called over to…you (?) and Remus.

“Well, we wouldn’t want to miss that, would we?” Remus murmured lowly into your ear as he steered you towards the growing circle congregating around the various chairs and sofas littering the common room.

And listen, you’re not particularly proud that you were so placid in Remus’ man handling you.

But in your defence…

In your defence, Remus was man handling you. 

And to your absolute horror, he plopped you down beside Lily on a large chair that was not quite large enough for two people. 

You tried to swallow your heart back down which was attempting to escape via your mouth as you became hyper focused on the fact that Lily sodding Evans was pushed up against you none too casually and- Merlin’s tits, was she playing with your hair!? 

You pretended to pay attention as a few rounds passed by; your friend being dared to give you a lap dance being the most brazen thing to have taken place.

Until it got to the Marauders.

Marlene dared Sirius to strip down to his boxers for a whole round which he was all but too eager to do, apparently. Meaning he got to ask the next person.

“Moony!” 

Remus smiled down at his lap before he looked over at one of his boyfriend’s mischievously. 

“I dare you to kiss the prettiest girl here.”

You’re not necessarily proud of the way your heart plummeted at that; this is what you had been telling yourself all night. They were taken.

No matter if they complimented you.

No matter if they caught you as you fell. 

No matter if they snuggled up to you on a chair designed for one.

No matter if one of them made you feel like you leaving the party early would have been truly devastating.

No matter.

“That’s impossible; there’s two of them.” Remus said quickly, causing your heart to ache for Lily.

Who even says that when their girlfriend is sitting right here!?

You kept your head down as the party all ooooh’ed and aawwwweee’d.

James let out a funny high pitched laugh as if he were an over excited kid on Christmas morning. “Guess you’ll have to kiss them both then.” 

You really should have left when you had the chance; you weren’t sure you could watch.

It was their business if they wanted to include another, but that didn’t mean you had to like it.

“Or they can kiss each other; I think I’d enjoy that just as much.” 

“Sounds good to me.” Lily said as she stood; the space she once inhabited felt cold and vacant without her.

“Well? Come on then?” She said as she grabbed your arm.

“What?”

“Come with me.” She said again, wiggling your arm within your grasp, and who were you to deny her, really?

Like a well trained dog you followed her obediently over to where Remus sat before she all but shoved you into his lap.

“You seem like the fidgety type; maybe Rem can help with that, hm?” She said as she shot a wink at Remus over your shoulder.

His arms wrapped possessively around your waist as he rested his chin on the junction between your neck and shoulder.

“Is it okay if she kisses you, pretty girl?”

You had no time to be absolutely horrified at the pathetic little keening sound that escaped your lips as you looked up at the red-head now towering over you.

“What do you say, gorgeous?” And though her emerald eyes did shine with some mischief, you could see she was earnest; this was your choice.

“Okay.” You whispered barely loud enough for you to hear yourself over the hammering of your heart.

“Yeah?” She whispered as she knelt in front of you.

“Yeah.” You agreed.

And you only got to see the soft, hopeful smile that adorned her lips for but a moment before her hands were on either side of your face and she was pressing her soft lips to yours. 

It could have been hours or centuries but it was also all too soon before she was pulling away from you; a proud smile on her lips though her cheeks were a similar colour to her hair.

You became aware of the hooting and hollering going on around you as Remus’ chest began to vibrate in laughter.

“Beautiful.” He murmured - likely more to himself than to you, but you heard it all the same.

“Do I get a turn?!” James shouted before Sirius roughly grabbed him by the waist and planted him down on his lap.

“Not before me, Jamie.” He snickered as he shot you a wink. 

The audacity of a man to still be so confident sitting in nothing but his boxers. 

You tried to hide behind your hands though it was all for naught as Remus made a theatrical cooing sound and pulled you further into his lap until you were all but cradled in his arms.

“Maybe without an audience next time, hm?” He asked you as he brushed some hairs away from your forehead.

Not trusting yourself to speak (or to even make direct eye contact with the bloke currently cuddling you in your lap), you nodded with your face still hidden.

“Way to go babe.” James said as Lily went to join the two boys on their loveseat. “You were so good, we’ll even get a next time!”

hii omg I absolutely adore your blog!! i love the interactions between the guys and reader, the way you write them makes them feel so so real 💫 I was wondering, how do you think they'd react to reader having a horrible nightmare and not being able to fall asleep? you dont have to write it ofc, and sorry for my english it's not my first language 🥰

Hi, thank you lovely! Please don't worry about your english, it's amazing and it'd be no problem even if it weren't, and thanks for requesting <3

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

You wake with a tear already slithering down your face from the injustice of it. Your chest feels empty and crushed, and you press your palm to your breastbone as if that will ease the hollow ache. You come to terms quickly with the fact that none of it was real, you’re okay, but there’s still evidence of your terror and indignation in your too-hot skin. You pull the sheets covering you to the side so that half your body is exposed to the cool air. 

“Hey.” The word is hardly more than a raspy exhale, Sirius’ voice slurred with sleep. You’d evidently slipped free of his arms at some point in the night. You distinctly remember falling asleep with his breath on your forehead, but now there’s nearly a foot of empty space between you. His face rubs against the pillowcase as he shifts to see you better. “Hey, what’s up?” 

“Nothing,” you say, though your voice is tight with unwanted tears. They keep squishing out of your eyes, like aftershocks of an earthquake that’s already fading from your memory. “Just a dream.” 

Sirius reaches for your face. His hand is pleasantly cool against your skin, but he makes a sleepy discontented sound at the wetness he finds. “You’re crying.” 

“Shh, you’ll wake them.” You cover his hand with yours, giving his fingers a reassuring squeeze. “I’m okay, go back to sleep.” 

Sheets rustle as James rolls over to face you. “Whas’ going on?” 

You sigh. “Nothing, sorry.” You turn your face from Sirius’ touch, moving one leg over the edge of the bed. “I’m going to go get some water.” 

“She’s crying,” Sirius tattles, though it’s hard to be too mad at him when his voice is still foggy with sleepy bemusement. He wraps his hand around your elbow. “Wait, stay.” 

You go to shush him again, but then you see that Remus already has his eyes open. He’s been watching you quietly for who knows how long. Superb. At least your crying has finally stopped. 

“What’s wrong, angel?” James says through a yawn, rubbing sleep out of his eyes as he props himself up on his elbow to see you over Sirius. “Bad dream?” 

“Yeah, just a dream,” you reassure him softly. “Go back to sleep, I’m sorry I woke you.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he says, though he still looks like he’s got weights sewn into his eyelids. “Wanna talk about it?” 

“No, thank you,” you say as kindly as you can. “I just want to get a drink, then I’ll go back to sleep.” 

“I’ll get it for you, love.” Remus’ voice is rough. He rolls over and says warningly, “Light,” before turning on the lamp beside the bed. Sirius makes a low moan of protest, turning his face into the pillow, and you and James both squint your eyes. Remus passes James his glasses, sitting up to get out of bed. 

“I can get it,” you object. You go to mirror him, but Sirius holds fast to your elbow, preventing you from moving off the mattress. 

“No, I know better.” Remus steps into his slippers. “I’ve got it, you stay.” 

You watch guiltily as he plods out of the room, then turn to James and Sirius with a bemused look. He knows better?

James gives you a small smile, tinged with apology. “Whenever you say you’re going to get water in the middle of the night, you never come back,” he explains as Sirius wraps his arms around your waist, drawing you closer. “None of us wants you to deal with these things on your own, angel.” 

Your face starts heating again with the knowledge that they’ve found you out. You do often say you’re going for water after nightmares like these, so that your boyfriends will go back to sleep even though you can’t. You usually end up sitting in the living room, distracting yourself with sudoku or reading until it’s a reasonable hour to make breakfast and pretend you’ve only just woken up.

“Give ‘er here, Pads,” James says at your touched silence. “We can share.” 

Sirius holds you to his front and rolls over, situating you between him and James on the bed. James takes your face in his hands and sets about kissing your salty cheeks, lips wet and smooshed and more loving than you could ever deserve. You can’t help but smile as he does it, and Sirius makes a quiet sound of satisfaction, giving your middle an appreciative squeeze. 

“They’re just dreams,” you argue when James pauses. “I don’t need to be babied over something that didn’t really happen.” 

“They’re still upsetting,” Remus says as he comes in with a cup of water, “aren’t they?” 

“Sort of, I guess.” You sit up to take the cup from him, doing your best to convey your gratitude through a look. He gives you a tired smile as he gets back in bed beside James. “But it’s like, half the time I don’t even know what I’m upset about. I forget them.” 

Sirius disentangles his arms from you as you sit upright. He settles for rubbing your lower back instead. “But you can’t sleep afterward.” It’s not a question. 

You take a sip of water, speaking quietly into the cup. “I think I get too worked up.” 

“That’s alright, darling.” Remus’ voice is soft and smooth as butter. “Your body’s just still working through the emotions of it all, yeah? But maybe, instead of running off and staying up all night, you could let us help you.” 

You look over at him. The warm light from the lamp makes his mussed brown hair look golden as he watches you consideringly. “How?” you ask tentatively.

“Seems like all you need is to calm down,” James says, looking up at you from where his head rests on the pillow just beside your hip. You want to squirm at all the attention, but there’s nothing pitying in his gaze. “We can at least try to help with that.” 

You hesitate, and Remus reaches over, wrapping his hand around your cup. “Done with this, lovely?” He takes it when you nod and sets it down on the nightstand. “Alright, lie down.” 

You do as he says, shimmying beneath the covers. Remus shuts off the light. 

Sirius’ grip is solid as he turns you by your hips, setting your back to his front. “Still feeling too warm?” he asks softly. 

You blink into the darkness. “How’d you know?” 

He chuckles, and you feel his lips press against the back of your head a moment before his hands snake under your pajama shirt, cool palms pressed flat to your stomach. “Because I know you, sweet girl.” 

“Do you think taking some deep breaths would help?” Remus murmurs. 

You’re not sure, but you try, counting as your lungs expand and contract until they start to feel a bit more like their normal size. 

“There you go.” James’ lips press to the spot between your brows. “Does that feel better, angel?” 

“Yeah,” you admit. The word emerges like a sigh. Your voice is slipping away, quieting as you grow drowsy. Sirius can tell, and he begins to rub his palm slowly back and forth across your ribs. It grows warm against your skin, but you don’t mind so much anymore. “Thank you guys. Sorry for waking you.” 

“Don’t worry about it, darling.” Remus’ words start to slur as his own sleep finds him. “We’d always rather all be awake than leave you by yourself.”

Plausible deniability | Poly! Marauders; A. Dolohov:

Warnings: jealousy; the boys are kind of dicks in this one; reader is a certified smartass; my dialogue is pretencious as hell; Dolohov is a desperate flirt.

Your lads leave you alone at a party you took them to, so they won't care if you happen to dance with someone else. Right?

You had always been a good girlfriend.

Scratch that, you always were a great girlfriend.

And you knew that for a fact.

There wasn't one thing in this world you wouldn't do for your boyfriends. Your love for them was beyond any type of rational comprehension, to the point you had made yourself look stupid in front of others just because you adored them so much.

All those days you stayed back to reason with a teacher, or a prefect or with Filch and talk them out of murdering your beloved boys while those same lads were out running to save their own skin; All those times you went out of your way to fix expulsion-worthy mistakes they commited during a prank; All those nights you lost sleep so you could help them study for the incoming exams you knew they had been ignoring in favor of perfecting yet another grandious plan to humiliate the Slytherins.

That was how you told them you loved them.

And you did.

Not only did you simply love them, you showed them you loved them.

So why was it that everytime you looked at one of them from the small green and silver couch you were sitting on, they seemed to have one or ten other girls in their arms?

You took them to this party. You were the sole reason they had gotten in here in the first place.

Would it kill them to spend five minutes with you before going off to do Godric knows what with other girls?

No.

It wouldn't.

You weren't jealous. That wasn't the point. If that was the case you would have walked up to them, muttered some half-polite excuse to whichever person was flirting with them and pulled the boy to dance with you.

But that wasn't the problem.

The problem was that you always bended over backwards for them, to meet their desires, to make sure they were healthy, make sure they were comfortable, make sure they were always feeling their best. If something of theirs broke, you were there to fix it. If they couldn't understand something, you figured it out and explained it to them. If they needed help with anything, you were always there, at their corner, ready to help with whatever you could.

You had always been a show instead of tell kind of person.

Your problem was, they were tell but never show kind of people.

Not one of your boys ever hesitated to tell you that they loved you and that they couldn't live without you and that they'd do anything for you, but they never seemed to come through in any of those things.

And for most that you tried to brush it off as them simply being from a world different than yours, it bothered you to hell and back.

There was nothing you could do, and you knew it.

It would be no good to cause a scene and forever be branded as the crazy girlfriend, specially since you knew they made a habit of downplaying your discomfort when it came to the subject of them being overly affectionate with people who clearly had less than innocent intentions.

So you stood up as calmly as you could manage and slowly made your way to the little bar Zabini had set up.

Whiskey, beer, liquour and rum. One next to the other, all painfully dry. Perhaps if you could squeeze out a drip or two from each bottle you'd end up with a 1/16 of a full cup. But that wasn't enough for you. So you pulled back your hand, and just as you were trying your best to recall that fancy little spell that turned water into rum, the soft glow of light over glass caught your eye.

A bottle of vodka. The people in this party were visibly much more prudent than you could wish to be, for the bottle wasn't only untouched, but fully sealed and nearly glimmering under the dim reddish lighting that bathed the room, like a singing siren, lulling in the occasional unsuspecting sailor, the kind who was desperate enough to fall for her games.

Well, yo-ho, motherfucker.

Taking you newfound treasure into your hands, you poured the liquid into a whiskey glass, an inch and a half full over the bottom. And with no hesitation whatsoever, you took a long and patient sip, without even making a face.

- You know, dear, I have been standing next to this bar for half an hour. I've seen all those bottles be drained to the last drop, but not a single person was mad enough to consider touching my vodka. - The smell of the cologne that surrounded you as whoever that was leaned in to speak into your ear might as well have carried the stench of blood with it, because never in your life had you heard someone so painfully obvious in their villany speak in such a shamelessly ill-willed way. - I must commend you for your taste, красивая.

Antonin Dolohov.

Of course.

When did he ever miss a single chance to shark you?

Rhetoric question, the answer was never.

- I do enjoy the taste of nothingness and incoming hangovers quite a bit, thanks for the commendment. - Still staring into your glass, you pretended not to feel the way he very glaringly leaned into the spot you had pressed your perfume into just an hour ago. - Cheers, Dolohov. Good health to you.

He smiled wolfishly as he watched you empty that glass in one breath, walking around the table to stand as close to humanly possible to you. - As much as seeing you drink like this gives me hope that you will toss those three western boys and get with the one that could actually be your drinking partner, we should really get a dance in so I can tell you what is happening.

- Remind me again of why would I ever consider dancing with you...

- Because I know things that evolve not only you, bu you future in this lovely establishment you call home.

You scoffed: - Okay, Mr. Bond.

- I prefer Stierlitz, but Bond will do for now. - He gently took the empty glass from your hand, setting it on the table and slowly placing his massive hands on your waist, making sure to rub down the silk dress with his thumbs as he grinned at you. - Shall we, my dear?

- You better not be playing tricks on me, Antonin.

He immediately perked up at the slight softened tone you had emplyed, taking advantage of the opportunity to pull you closer as the both of you swayed to the upbeat madness of Siouxie and the Banshees. - Wow, first name basis again. Have you finally forgiven me, zaychik? Should I put your silk sheets back onto our bed?

- We were never in an empty room alone for more than two minutes, Dolohov. Let alone sleep together.

- You and I are meant to be, zaychik. You'll realize that sooner or later.

- You know I adore listening to your ravenous delusions, but cut to the chase, will you?

- Your wish is my command, my sweet. - You could feel James' eyes starting to search the area around you, and you couln't deny it hurt that he hadn't even noticed you weren't away being a wallflower anyomore. - A friend of mine has been fulfilling duty at Filch's office. He says that McGonagal and Slughorn have been going in and out of his office all day long, whispering secret messages, handing him suspecious papers with the ministry of magic seal, all sorts of things like that. So I told him to look into it.

- How wise of you.

- I knew you'd think so too, zaychik. - He had this strange habit of running the tip of his index finger up your spine and down your arms, and the fact that he was getting closer and closer didn't make you any less uncomfortable. - So anyhow, after Filch left, he found a paper near the burner and in this paper were your name and mine together, along with the names of all your ungrateful little lovers and the names of my friends.

- What the fuck?

- That's what I said. - He seemed genuinely amused by the fact you two held the same line of thinking, and it would've been actually a bit sweet to see him like that if your eyes didn't meet Sirius' for a split second. He did not seem happy. - What kind of paper would have the name of a two model students like you and I above a list of the most trouble-making and irresponsible people in the school?

- A paper that lists people who are either involved or facilitate riotous behaviour. The ministry wants to cut the tree by it's roots. You an I are fixers, casualties. They fuck up, we go there an make sure they're not expelled...

- Only so they can go and do it again as soon as the coast is clear. - He mumbled in an irritated tone just as the music shifted, and you had never felt so seen. - Cunts.

- You too?

- If you think trying to convince teachers that their favorite troublemakers shouldn't be thrown out of school, try arguing that same case for the students they despise the most.

- I can't fucking believe them.

- You and I are more similar than you would like to admit, my darling. That's why I'm warning you. That's why we should be together.

- You lost me at 'more similar than you'd like to admit'.

- Not even you can deny that we should join forces if we want those we care about not to be publicly humiliated. If we work together, and we find a way to invalidate whatever claims the ministry is trying to make, then we can save their arses and go along our lives knowing that we did the right thing while they were out being debils. - His eyes glimmered in hope as he watched you consider the offer, his hands pulling you flush into his body, so close that he could barely stand the warmth of your skin seeping through the layers of clothes that separated you. - What do you say, zaychik?

- You're right. I hate to admit it, but credit where credit is due. - Antonin could feel hilself swell up with pride, and he immediately took a step back, cordially raising a hand towards you like a proper gentleman.

- Pleasure doing business with you, little bunny. - Your hand met his as the both of you smiled, pretending you didn't hear Dolohov's heart beating out of his chest. - You have a plan?

- I have the begining of one.

- We could draw this plan out back in my dorm, perhaps I'll allow you some of my tsarskaya vodka.

- I'm not a whore.

- I wouldn't pay. - He grinned, seizing to sway for the first time and squeezing your hips in his hands.

- That's charming. Which Gangster did you steal that line from?

- It disappoints me that you don't know. It'll be my life's mission to educate you in soviet culture before we eventually get married. - You couldn't help but laugh. He was quite charming, and it felt nice to be noticed for once. But you were so invested in Antonin's back and forth jokes that you didn't notice Sirius calling for Rem and James. You didn't notice how mad they looked. And you definetly didn't notice that for the first time since they had gotten here, they were excusing himself off from the girls they had surrounded himself with. And they probably didn't notice that it was the first time in the night they had worried the slightest bit about you. - Oh, I love this song. You'll dance with me won't you? To celebrate our alliance.

- I should really get to to mapping out that plan. - You excused, drawing yourself back from him only for Dolohov to pull you right back.

- Oh, rumba. Sorry, you cannot escape a Frank Sinatra song.

- Is that so?

- You'll have to dance with me until another singer comes along. And I fear they just put on one of his longest records. - You laughed as he pulled you into him, guiding you through a performance of 'mind if I make love to you'. Your dress swirled around you, the iridescent fabric glowing under the light as he spun you around, and you felt glad you were here for the first time in the night. The same could not be said about the lads that watched as the two of you entretained yourselves.

You were in for it tonight.

.............no comment

Hi can you do a sub!James and he is sucking on our titis and we keep pulling them away and he starts whining and eventually starts crying thanks bye

Frustration || Poly!Marauders

Word Count: 2885

A/N: I love this request but I'm not sure the vibes of the piece did it justice I just hope that you all more or less enjoy it! I meant to get this out yesterday but I didn't have the time, I'm hoping to get back to a more normal writing schedule though

Warnings: mommy!kink I don't know why you're surprised honestly, titty sucking, teasing, crying, poly relationship

Masterlist

James’ day had been a miserable ordeal. After dragging himself from classroom to classroom, barely summoning the energy to keep his head up he had landed in the place that had always provided him the most solace. That being of course the soft cushions of your tits.

The minute you’d entered your boyfriends’ dormitory you’d found it empty aside from James who was sitting on the edge of Sirius’ bed. It being closest to the door must’ve meant that he was simply too tired to drag himself the extra ten feet to his own bed, the thought made your chest tighten. Poor baby.

Worry furrowed your brow as you drank in his appearance, usually broad shoulders pulled straight seemed to curl in on themselves leaving him looking half the size he usually did. His eyelids were drooping under the weight of long, dark lashes, hiding pretty hazel eyes that usually lit up the minute you entered the room.

Today however, it seemed as though he didn’t even register your presence. That had been your first clue as to something was off with your boy.

“Jamie?” You murmured, it was then that he finally turned to see you, the smallest of smiles tugging upwards at his lips.

The sleepy look on his face was nothing absent of absolutely adorable, he’d already shed himself of his shoes, bag and school robes, each scattered about the relatively clean room. Looking at him you resisted the urge to launch yourself into his lap and curl up with your head resting against his chest.

A warmth swelled in your chest as you made your way towards James and the sleepy smile adorning his lips grew until it broke out into a full fledged smile and he was parting his legs so that you could slip between them. Your arms automatically slinging themselves across his shoulders, crossing one over the other behind his neck.

“Are you feeling okay, pretty boy?” Came your hushed voice as you ran your fingers raked through the mess or tangled curls atop his head, scratching against his scalp lightly as you watched him lean into your touch.

“M a little sleepy Mommy.”

At the use of the pet name your hand slid down from James’ scalp to his cheek where you cradled the side of his face, tipping his visage upwards. Your thumb rubbed lazy circles along his bottom lip before slipping it just past the seal of his red, plump lips.

With as much enthusiasm as he could muster in his fatigued state James accepted your digit into his mouth, suckling the finger as his hands ventured upwards to find yours, using both to anchor your palm ensuring you couldn’t pull away.

You knew James like the back of your hand and when he was like this there was but one thing that would provide him the comfort he so desired. You were more than ready to give it to him, the only issue being that that would require removing your finger from his mouth.

Slowly but surely you managed to slip your finger from his pretty pink lips, drawing a perturbed whine from the boy.

“Mommy,” He whimpered, pushing his bottom lip out in a pathetic little pout as his strong arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you flush against his front, “Why’d you pull away your finger?”

“Thought I would give you something better to suck on,” You offered with a playful tilt of your head.

You simpered as he visibly perked up, hoping so desperately that you were talking about what he thought you were.

“Y’tits Mommy?” He asked tentatively, almost as if the words themselves would make you change your mind.

You hummed your assent as you ran a palm down the smooth, hard planes of his back, savoring the solid feeling of him below beneath your touch, “You gonna take my top off baby or do you not want my titties?”

Frantic shakes of his head quickly followed your words and solid fingers flew to the hem of your shirt where the bottom most button resided. His hands stalled as big hazel eyes cast themselves upwards to meet your gaze, silently asking for permission before removing your top which you quickly granted, leaning down to press the most delicate kiss against the tip of his nose.

In a matter of seconds James had revealed the soft sloping planes of your stomach and began smearing sloppy, open mouthed kisses against the delicate skin there, trails of saliva gleaming in the light as goosebumps arose on your skin. His lips on you were like magic and you couldn’t help but arch your back, needing his touch.

As his fingers slipped the final button through its hole you eagerly shrugged the garment off your shoulders, paying it no mind as your hands flew behind you, finding the clasp of your bra and making quick work of it to present your bare tits to the slobbering boy in front of you.

His jaw dropped seemingly to the floor like he hadn’t seen your tits dozens, Merlin, hundreds of times and you watched his fingers itch at his sides.

“They’re all yours, darling.”

“Mine?”

“Yours,” You agreed, smiling as his large hands grasped your waist, encircling it as he pulled you over his lap and laid you down, flat on your back.

You let out a giddy giggle at the abrupt movement. This was one of the things you so loved about James, it was these displays of his insurmountable strength that excited you. Despite said strength, despite the fact he could throw you around like he just had he only did when you permitted him to, only when you willed it.

Big, strong boy on his knees for you, awaiting your instruction. Godric, he made for a pretty sight.

“Y’so strong Jamie,” You praised as a delicate hand gripped his bicep, loving the pretty pink blush that dusted across the apples of his cheeks.

“Thank you Mommy,” He said bashfully, “Can I suck on your titties now? Please?”

With just a single nod of your head he was ducking his, finding himself in what had always been his most favorite place.

Cradled between the soft mounds of your tits he felt the stress and exhaustion from the day radiate him, wave after wave emanating from his wilted form.

Slotting your pert nipple between the pillowy cushions of his lips his eyes fluttered closed as he began suckling lazily, whimpering as he wiggled his body so that almost every inch of him had some sort of contact with you. The feeling of his skin against yours was addictive and as much as it was for him, hoping to do anything that would work to soothe the poor boy, the feeling of his body against yours sent warmth shooting to every nook and cranny of your body, warming you from the inside out.

“You like sucking on my nipple don’t you pretty baby?”

Instead of pulling off your nipple to answer your question properly James hummed his assent around it, causing ripples of pleasure to shoot through you at the sensation.

“Ah ah ah Jamie, come on, you know how to properly answer me when I ask you a question,” You chaisted, gently easing his mouth off your tit so that he could answer you verbally. Despite his vehement resistance at being separated from your tit he reluctantly let go, not wanting to hurt you by insisting on latching on.

“Now come on, answer me like the good boy I know you are,” You encouraged with a soft kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Mommy, want your titty please, love it so much, please,” He helplessly opened and closed his mouth, like a helpless little guppy, desperate to latch back onto the comfort of your breast.

“Please,” He pleaded, displaying his best puppy eyes in hopes of convincing you.

As always they did the trick and you gently guided his awaiting mouth back to your tit, closing your eyes as he began suckling once more.

The two of you laid there in peace and calm, James feeling himself uncoiling after his tiring day and you simply melting under his touch, always so gentle. The way he touched you you’d think he was handling fine china, gentle caresses up and down your arms, a palm resting against your hip, having slipped under the hem of your skirt, all done with the utmost care.

You weren’t quite sure how long you’d laid there with him, the picture of peace and serenity, but you were almost certain he’d drifted off into a light sleep. Even in his sleep he registered the din coming from the staircase that would eventually lead to the dorm.

Letting out an annoyed whine he sucked harder at your tit, one hand moving to cup the swell of your breast.

“Sounds like we’re getting company Jamie.”

Just seconds after you spoke the solid oak door to the dorm swung open, revealing the smiling mischievous faces of Sirius and Remus, flushed from running.

Running from what?

Now, that was the question.

“Shhh,” You tried to quiet the boys as they sauntered into the room, hoping that they would take pity on the clearly tired boy hanging off your side and keep their voices down for the sake of their boyfriend.

Wishful thinking.

“Aww look Moons, the baby’s nursing,” Sirius taunted, eyes immediately locking on his form, shedding the leather jacket he favored to his school robes as he made his way to the side of the bed closest to James’ curled up figure.

“Don’t be mean Siri, you know it helps him relax,” You glared at him warningly as he sat down on the edge of the mattress, hand immediately going to card through James’ curls.

“Is that right?” Remus inquired, slipping in behind Sirius, lifting the thick curtain of raven hair off his neck to gently kiss the skin that resided there, “Does it relax our little Jamesie?”

James let out yet another disgruntled whine as he opened his eyes up to small slits, just enough to glare at his boyfriends, never relenting on his sucking.

There was nothing the two dogs enjoyed more than teasing James deeper into subspace, always remaining conscious of boundaries.

“I’m sorry for making fun of you Jamesie,” Rem apologized, leaning in so that his face was hovering mere inches over Jamesie’s, “Could I have a kissie please?”

After contemplating it James eased himself off your nipple, not without a small whimper of course, and stretched his neck, lips puckering to meet Remus’.

Remus’ hand slipped under James’ mandible, supporting his drooping head as his lips interlocked with his. Even from your position sitting back you could see as the werewolf’s tongue effortlessly broke the seal of the slightly smaller boy’s lips, delving into the warm enclave of his mouth.

The other boy’s lips seemed to provide James almost as much comfort as your tit but that didn’t mean that as they each pulled away breathlessly that James wasn’t settling his head right back down on your breast.

“Not so fast, I want a kissie too Jamesie, s’only fair.” Sirius insisted, hand finding James’ jaw and using his grip to pull his face back up, giving him no choice but to release your nipple.

James’ whines were quickly swallowed by Sirius as he embraced his boyfriend in a deep, passionate kiss, nipping at his bottom lip as he pulled their two bodies closer to each other. You’d always find it endearing that despite Sirius being significantly smaller than Jamie he was like putty in his hands and never failed to become malleable under his touch.

Once Sirius finally relinquished his grasp on James his head was once again falling to your tit, mouth already open before he even neared your boob.

“Not so quick there baby,” Sirius caught James’ face before it could drop once more, “Remmy got a kiss, I got a kiss, it’s (Y/N/N)’s turn is it not? It sounds only fair to me.”

“I think you’re right, Pads,” Remus chimed in, “Go on Jamie, give your Mommy a kiss.”

“But want her titties,” He whined, speaking for the first time since you were joined by the boys you affectionately referred to as your “dogs”.

“You wouldn’t want her to feel left out would you?” Sirius asked with mock worry as he tipped his head to the side, by now he’d perfected his fake pouting.

You were all too happy to accept James’ lips as they grazed yours, keeping the kiss gentle compared to the ones you witnessed between him and the other boys. Regardless it was still as though that kiss fed your soul with the feeling of James’ lips against your own.

You allowed his lips to glide down the side of your face, trailing down the soft skin of your neck, then your collar bone before finding your tit again and right as he moved to make it back into his mouth Remus’ low baritone cut through the room.

“I don’t remember you asking if you could suck (Y/N)’s tit James,” You watched with a smirk as James responded to Remus’ authoritative tone.

“But Mommy said-”

“I’m sorry I should rephrase,” Remus amended, “I don’t remember you asking me if you could suck on (Y/N)’s tit.”

James’ hazel optics flickered up to your face, looking at you to tell Remus that you’d granted him permission to your tit but you were both aware that Remus pulled rank over you. Remus pulled rank above everyone and if he said you needed permission you needed permission.

“If Remmy said you gotta ask bubba,” You pressed a kiss against his hairline, “Then you gotta ask.”

“But....”

When you all stayed silent, awaiting smirks atop each of your lips as you all watched James, waiting for him to fulfill Remus’ request.

Finally he relented, “Please, can I suck Mommy’s titty?” Though his words were obedient his tone was that of a temperamental toddler but regardless Remus granted him his request and it was only seconds before you felt the warm wetness of his mouth wrap around your nipple, saliva smearing across the rest of your tit as he struggled to find a good hold.

“Sounds like our pretty boy had a long day and could use some time to rest,” Your eyes fluttered from the dark curls atop James’ head to where Remus and Sirius sat with the latter practically in the bigger boy’s lap.

“As much as he might need it we’ve got Quidditch practice doll and it's time to get ready,” Sirius pushed himself up off the bed, starting to ease James away from you but the minute your nipple slipped from the confines of James’ mouth he was sniffling, sobs instead of whines falling from his lips as salty tears weighed down on his lower lashes.

“Don’t wanna go,” James cried, curling up closer into your side as he refused to move, “Want your titty Mommy please, s too much.”

“Shhh s’okay pretty baby,” You soothed as combed his hair out of his face, throwing a glare at Sirius to which he raised his hands in the air.

“Siri’s sorry, he didn’t mean to upset you. Yeah there we go,” You urged, helping him ease back onto your tit, “Stay right here baby. Si, maybe you can lead practice today?” You asked, raising an expectant brow.

After a gentle kick at his calf from Remus, Sirius relented, moping about as he got ready for practice, mumbling something about “promotion” and “assistant captain”.

It wasn’t until Sirius left the room, and Remus, sensing James needed time alone with you, drifted off down the staircase, most likely to the library to work on his studies, that James melted back into you like he had before you’d been interrupted.

In the quiet of the room you realized that you could still hear the faint sniffles coming from the boy on top of you, craning your head you saw that salty tears had pooled on the apples of his cheeks, nose red from crying.

“Are you okay pretty boy? You get overwhelmed?”

James nodded his head, adjusting his hold on your tit.

Your heart broke at the pathetic little noises that escaped from James’ mouth, wanting nothing more than to kiss his tears away and make him feel safe. Though you and your other boys had fun teasing James when it came to his infatuation with you, as though Sirius and Remus didn’t share in said infatuation, it wasn’t the verbal teasing that had tipped James over the edge, it was the being separated from the one thing he’d looked forward to all day.

“I’m sorry Jamesie, we didn’t mean to overwhelm you, thought we were having fun,” You frowned as you observed his face, “Wasn’t too much fun though was it?”

“Just want your titties Mommy,” He explained, voice muffled around the soft tissue of your boob, “That’s all.”

“Alright then Jamie,” You granted, running your fingers through his dark waves as you closed your eyes and let your head tilt back, hoping sleep would take the invitation and wash over you sooner rather than later, “Just go ahead and suck.”

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