Stuck - Blog Posts
"Awwww hell… they're for sure stuck aren't they?" One captor asked the other, knowing full well the answer. "Shit… no no no, I thought we were gonna save money when we ordered the smaller silos, didn't you measure to make sure they'd fit?" The other captor replied with a question. "I mean yeah. I measured once and did an avera-" "Average?! Do these girls look like their proportions are average?! Gah… The boss is gonna lose her head when she sees this travesty." The other captor sighs, and then lets out a chuckle. "You gotta admit tho, its kinda funny." A glare could be felt searing into the side of the captor who just spoke as the other was fuming.
Aaaaaand scene!
Hi all! This is the last commission for the year! (But hopefully not the last art of the year!😉) Some no good captors tried to put Aria and Violi in some silo's but failed to do their measurements right and the two got stuck as a result due to their sizable assets. This one had me giggling and I hope you enjoy too! 💜
I found him. I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as he spazzes into the sunset.
So I’m writing down ideas on how to traumatize a character I just made- I had five ideas, wrote down two, now I have seven-
Send help please-
Was playing as Rocket in Marvel Rivals and got stuck under the train in Hell’s Heaven
Life Goes On
Breathe
I tell myself as I want to leave
But right now I don’t know how
I have been stuck
In a little bit of a rut
And my hatred for fakes Grew to the size of lakes
It feels like I'm playing a game
That doesn’t have any aim
I'm curious which is why I play
While I keep my feelings at bay
I have become tired of hiding behind doors
And metaphors
Frozen in mid breath,
Sitting before death
The reaper scares me no longer
Not because I've become stronger,
But because I've become scared of going on as life does
Just because
Catch 22
I'm tired of this shell
And this name
And the world spinning
The problem is that I need to shatter myself
And it just seems impossible
Like an equation that I can’t figure out without being unstoppable
Problem is, the issues grow longer like this infestation of words
If only I knew the answer to the question of why?
Then I would have just another key,
That would lead to another empty chest
Because there’s none for me, nope not a pair
Except for emptiness like two pits of despair
Can’t you feel through your metallic layers?
I don’t like wannabe robots
Even if all you’ve done is make a helmet out of a kitchen strainer
Bee hives don’t dance for nothing, honey!
And I'm buzzing with kinetic energy,
With nowhere to go but this shell
Solved are not my problems,
Of being fucking stuck
Either way I'm seen as an evil little fucker
Stuck like cling wrap to this plastic world
Seemingly unavoidable in every imaginable possibility that I can think,
With my eyes held wide open I can’t even blink
In this torturous place I can’t live forever
Even if I can call it my own
Even if it’s here forever
My need to have this shell shattered is strong
I want to feel it shake and shatter
Hear it crack down like pitter, patter, smash
Shell, hell, what's the difference?
I like the fire in the devil that melts my cold heart
Because I'm tired of this invisible prison cell
Yellow Lines
Staring into the yellow lines
Trying to go with the flow
I cannot bring myself to look up at the pines
Delirious depression in this mechanical car is a light load Sitting next to one of my discombobulating demons
Unable to run or fight it
Inside I am scream'n
This makes me want to fuck shit Staring at the two yellow lines, I think...
About last year when I climbed the walls
I should take leaps for the fun of the falls
Onto the sun warmed tar I desire to sink Thinking about two people who give me hope
That is for whatever is next to come
I feel the slope,
That leads into my own personal slum
Two lines, two women who are fierce
How far will I get with the uneven yellows?
Bright yellow does pierce
Stuck like a baby in the backseat type of mellow What to do when I turn the stone of 18?
My enemy has me trapped and constantly, greedily coming back
I have to hold the slack
What do I even know? One thing is for certain
I will keep moving forwards
Hopefully I'll stick with my words
I will go wherever the yellow snakes take me, in order to see the man behind the curtain
Writer's Block :(
That moment when you can't get the pencil to write
When the paper bites
Writer's block
Is worse than getting stuck with your brother's smelly sock
Too many thoughts on my mind
I need to write so I'll know I'll be just fine
Into a ball I want to curl
I need to stop hiding from the world
The moment you are so numb that nothing helps, not even music
I know I have the power but I'm afraid to use it
It would just cause me trouble
Make my world as I know it crumble
You start to think
At writing you stink
You don't want to write it all
Can't risk another fall
You are plain 'ol stuck
Wishes on shooting stars for better luck
What you don't realize is that it's all there
You need to take the dare
Too many thoughts yet at the same time I have an empty head
So for now I'm off to bed
Recently Allison and I watched the classic film Stand By Me. I don't want to ruin the plot for anyone who hasn't seen the movie but at a certain point the narrator says how he and the other boys felt better than they ever had before because "right then we knew exactly who we were and where we were going". Surprisingly it was at this point that I had a small epiphany.
I realized I had never felt this way before.
Never have I had something that consumed my whole life in that way. A goal that made me feel like I knew exactly what I had to do and why I had to do it. It made me a bit depressed but also made me realize that I was missing that one thing in my life.
The biggest question I need to ask myself now is what that one thing might be.
Down the road
Allison and I have been living in tiny one bedroom apartment for almost the last two years. When we first moved in we knew it was small but it felt huge. Allison was coming from a studio apartment and I fresh from my parents house, we had our own space and some room to breathe.
Now after the last 20 months we're ready to get out. Every little thing has become a thorn in our side making it more of a temporary place to sleep than a home. To be honest the reason we moved in was because it was cheap (less than $100 more than Allison's studio), I could ride my bike to work and it was our first place together, a starter home.
The focus now is getting out. Good news is Allison has a far better job than she did when we moved into this place, the bad news is that even though I've been searching for almost the past four months I am still jobless. It's one of the most depressing things for me to think that we could be stuck in this apartment another year because no other place will take us due to my situation.
A metaphorical
Gun to my head
Threaten a fate
I would rather
Instead
A moment too soon
Or not soon enough
Maybe this metaphor
Is more real
Than I thought